Authentic presence elicits calm confidence and ease in those those come in contact with it. No doubt you have experienced it. Recall meeting someone, who just being around seemed to put you at ease. Someone with whom you soon felt connected and trusting. It wasn't because they were a close friend or what they were saying that was so compelling, it was something about them. What is it about people like this that you and I are drawn to? It is their authentic presence.
Field of Power
In the Shabala tradition, authentic presence is defined as...
Field of Power
In the Shabala tradition, authentic presence is defined as a "field of power." (Tibetan: wangthang) Your field of authentic power
comes not from authority, but from being your genuine , transparent,
accepting, purpose-centered self, in service to others. When you
radiate this essential goodness, it resonates with the same essential
goodness in others and extraordinary rapport is created.
You don't have to look only to enlightened beings for these qualities,
you have them within you and you will find them in ordinary people and
events.
Ordinary Folks and Authentic Power
I had the experience of being in the authentic presence of Ron, our general contractor and Jane my new dietician recently:
Ron
Ron is the general contractor for the building of our retreat cabin and
every time we meet with him my wife usually says something like: "How
much more calm I feel after talking with Ron." I understand, I have the
same experience. Ron demonstrated a good deal of emotional intelligence
but there's much more. Ron is calm yet animated, direct yet sensitive
and doesn't seem to have a shred of ego. If someone else has an idea,
Ron is quick to consider it. He displays a easy sense of humor and is
able to laugh at himself. He gives his total attention, even to things
he may have heard a million times before and looks directly at you with
eyes shining with compassionate interest. His genuine aura seems to
fill the room and draw you in - A field of power.
Jane
I had a similar experience of authentic presence with someone I just
met by telephone. My person line rang on a Saturday morning and I
heard: "Hello this is Jane from LDS calling." "If anything can go wrong
getting started with our service," she went on, "it all seemed to
happen to you." "First you experienced disappointment with a faulty
allergy test, then you were frustrated by a long wait while we
corrected the problem and even had to worry about errors in billing.
"I'm happy to say we've got it all straightened out now." Jane said.
And then, "Your report will be ready next week, but I just happened to
be working this morning and thought I'd try you to give you some
advance information. Do you have a few minutes to talk?"
In that opening statement, delivered in a genuinely sincere and caring way, she had not only indicated her understanding, but she validated my emotional experience. She established a connection with me that created trust and ease as well as possibility. It was more than just the words of acknowledgment, she resonated genuine interest in me - my feelings and my concerns. It was infectious.
We went on to talk about other issues that were both personal and important. Drawn in to her authentic "field of power", I felt comfortable to be very open and transparent. She did more than listen, she heard, and she communicated that by validating my experience throughout the conversation.
Foundations of Authentic Presence?
What was it that enabled these two very different people to demonstrate
authentic presence? I recognize in their being three things that are a
foundation for authentic presence: Awareness, personal responsibility
and a strong sense of purpose. Each of them were aware of their own
thoughts and feelings as well as mine and they applied their emotional
intelligence. They each saw them selves as having the power to choose
their experience, not blaming or making excuses and that created
absolute confidence. It is also very obvious that both Jane and Ron
recognize that their purpose is to give their skill in service to
others and they take great pleasure in doing it. that gave them passion
and the total results was authentic presence.
Steps To Your Power
You may not be able to develop the skills in all of these area at once
but you can start and develop as you go. You can choose to develop your
emotional intelligence by first paying attention to feelings. You can
start recognizing the choices that you make and the results that you
create. And you can take some time to get in touch with your purpose -
How you will give your talents and abilities in service to others.
Joseph Liberti
Copyright 1998-2007 Joseph Liberti. All rights reserved. Joseph Liberti coaches leaders and coaches to liberate authentic self through the development of emotional intelligence. Feel free to copy and distribute this article as long as you keep this credit. For more tips on developing emotional intelligence visit Joseph's other blog EQ Tips
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